"You guys are meanies! Why can't we embrace everyone, even the shitheads and the abusers? I'm sure they have a really good reason..."

I'd much rather have people with strong opinions that are freely shared, than a bunch of people toeing some imaginary PC line in order not to offend anyone.

This conversation spawned out of an initial posting, but I think most of the dialogue had nothing to do with any one specific person. We heard passionate arguments on many facets of this topic, with (I feel) the only disappointing responses to be from those chiding us like children to "play nice". This isn't kindergarten, and I think the nature of WIITWD makes frank and honest discussion of possibly heated topics ever more relevant, and hopefully encouraged.

Sounds like this list will once again revert back to announcements without much substance.


"Who cares about cheaters? They're not hurting you!"

I do - if someone, anyone, has the balls to openly use the confidentiality and protection of the kink community to non-consensually hurt and betray their life partner, you bet your ass I care - I wouldn't want to associate with someone like that, even on a superficial social level.

Actions speak volumes about a persons character and integrity - infidelity is quite a large red flag to me.

Again, I'm not speaking about one person, but anyone who has the capacity in themselves to disregard the love and trust another has placed in them, and abuse it for selfish personal pleasure.

Actually, that's not true - as I'm typing this, I'm listening to the governor of SC tearfully apologize for his little lark down in Argentina. I don't think there's any doubt about what happened there...



And something I didn't add there: sure, where this guy sticks his dick (or his flogger) doesn't concern me, and I could easily turn a blind eye to his antics. Who cares? We don't have to act like we live in a society, where our neighbors actions don't affect our own lives. Next time though, it might be me - and I wouldn't act quite so blase about THAT situation. It's all well and good to have a hypothetical conversation about what if's and infidelity, but when applied to your own relationship and betrayal, few hold such lofty and idealized reactions. That shit HURTS, and when it happens to you, it's very personal.