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It takes some serious cojones to carve this onto the clerks window of the COURT - mayhaps you're not a first time offender?

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At Valley Fair before Hookah, I forgot all about this one!
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Wednesday & Thursday:

Watched Nick & Chris while Kelly & Randy were in Aruba. Damn, those boys can procrastinate like nobody else! They also "exaggerate" a lot, then backpedal by saying "just kidding!". I didn't realize it, but that bugs the everloving shit out of me. No, it's not sarcasm, it's lying done poorly. Don't constantly lie to my face, and see if you get caught. That will annoy me, and when I am annoyed, treats are less forthcoming.

Thursday was the morning to run around and pray to Jeebus that all my car shite got solved. It did - an hour at DMV (they only have 2 people working for the first hour), then another hour to get to MPPD for the release and the tow company for the car (they stole the iphone radio cord). All told, the total was just under $2000, an expensive lesson, but an important one - make sure your record is clean at all times! Now there's just the ticket I got last week to clear up in December, and I'm all set. It's going to be nice to get all this behind me and finally done with.

That means I'm flat broke for December. What's nice is that I've already got a few extra gigs lined up to help pay down that debt as fast as possible - sometimes it's nice when karma helps you up after kicking you down. My old landlord from San Mateo asked me to dogsit over the new year holiday, right out of the blue.

Friday was the Direct Light Munch (shadow couldn't make it), and was made of Win & Uber Epic Awesome. Shelly played with someone who has a penile implant, and didn't even ask him anything about it, so naturally, we grilled her mercilessly for 2 hours. I mean, you're face to face (well, face to cock) with a bionic cock, and you don't even notice? Did the balls clang? Does it have a pump? Does he leak oil? If you overpump him, will it explode (duh, yes!)? Oh, so many questions...

Saturday was nail day. I had broken a nail Friday night, & had gotten the crystal clear nail tips from ebay, so I decided to take off all the acrylic nails and tried the gel. I gotta say, the gel is super easy to use! I embedded different colored glitter into one of the layers, and it looks so damn fancy! It reminds me of the nails I used to get up in Ben Lomond with Marianne - she mixed up a custom glitter acrylic for me. I do love the way the gel looks and wears, but I have a feeling that fills & full set changes are going to be a bitch, since they have to be filed off, not soaked off.

I cleaned the house (which is 1000x easier when I actually keep up with it!), pulled all the Christmas stuff out of storage. Hey, if they can play carols & sell christmas shit in the store already, I can decorate now!

Saturday night: Fusion party. Shelly & I went for pretty much one reason - the Sybian. She'd never used one before, and it had been years for me, so we both took turns taking it for a spin. She didn't care for it, I liked it, but not $2000 worth of like. The hostess of the party made a rather large blunder when congratulating a friend on her pregnancy..."I'm not pregnant, I just had surgery to prevent that very thing." Damn, I can't believe she said that. We can't believe she said that. Who says that? Oh, she said that. DAMN, she didn't even apologize!

Sunday: Bella came over to hang out, and spent most of the time jumping on my bed. That little girl also loves to spray Febreeze on my bed, too. If only she'll get into washing the dishes, it'll be a perfect setup! Attempted to feed her lunch and get her to take a nap, but she'd only eat a little bit (how does she stay so hyper with no fuel?), and my house was way too exciting to nap in, so we headed back to Herhers for naptime. I then went over to Kelly's for shift change with Tina - I was watching the boys until Kelly & Randy came back from Aruba around 11. We had dinner at Heathers, made cupcakes, thoroughly annoyed poor Vinny, and generally tore shit up. Went to Cowabungas for a treat, since Glinda's was closed, and then home to geek out and procrastinate doing....well, doing anything. Those boys need a damn fire lit under their asses to do anything. "10 minutes till bed, 5 minutes, 1 minute...ok, time to go." "Uhh, can I finish...Uhh, can I do xxx?" Nope, I just flicked it off/took the book away - you should have done it earlier. I think I'm going to be a bitch of a mom.

Today, I got the rest of my nail stuff from eBay - colored acrylic (I wonder if I can do a layer of acrylic over the gel for designs), practice wheels, rhinestones, glitter, brushes, palettes, and other assorted awesomeness. We really have to schedule a girly girl night to do all this shit.

2008: I found out Heather was pregnant. Yay!

2007: I got Mistress Fluffy mac from Bill, & retired the old faithful white mac

2006: Living in London, built my first fire in a fireplace, Duffy the Zampire Slayer with Nathan & Nick was born

2005: School full time, working for Scott, boy drama

2004: Pro-domming

2003: Different boy drama

That's as fat back as Livejournal goes for me - damn, six years of journaling. I go through phases where I post more or less, right now is one of the low parts. I do have my twitters fed here so I can remember what I did when. For a while, I was posting for the amusement/attention of others, but I'd really like to get back to using this as an actual journal, so I can write down my thoughts and ponderings.

Weekend Update:

Friday: watched kids - it was fun! The little one was super-hyper, & crawled all over me like a jungle gym.

Saturday: fixed nails - I decided to cover them all in glitter, didn't like the look, then took it all off & filed it off (red & black don't like to come off) to re-do it. After all that, I broke a nail on the way over to Edges - just my luck!

Makeup


Nails



Trying to get into the no-sulfates & no silicone haircare regimen - my conditioner is good, my mousse is good, but my shampoo & body wash/bubble bath have sulfates. I'm sure it's not too bad if I use it in the tub, & as soon as it's gone, I'll replace it with something better. I have to say, my hair feels super thin compared to what it used to be, but that just be the way I cut it. It is really soft, but not much curly curl like I used to have.

Saturday afternoon, we all descended upon Heather's house to get ready for The Great Trick or Treat Trek of 2009! Whitney & Heather were Bert & Ernie (and did an amazing job, too), Ian was a pimp, & Vinny was the most realistic 70's guy ever - he even doused himself in cheap cologne! Vinny's mom went as Minnie Mouse, with the ears I gave Bella.


Bert & Ernie


Tinkerbella doesn't like the look of Bert


I wimped out and went as the color red.


The Bros


Chris was an amazing Elvis - there's nothing like being serenaded by Elvis while he's bouncing on a trampoline! Nick's costume was a blowup ostrich, with fake little legs on it, so it looked like he was riding it. Cool, but way too big & unwieldy for a 10 year old who is intent on getting the candy - he almost knocked the wee ones down a few times.

Tinkerbella



Bella was Tinkerbella, and with her hair up in a ponytail, she was super cute! The wand wasn't around for long, since it's tough to navigate stairs with a wand in one hand and a trick or treat basket in the other. She was really diggin' on the idea that you get candy at EVERY house - "Let's get more!" and "Next One!" were mantras for her that night. Sophie was Super Girl, and pretty much slept through everything. Napping is her kryptonite, drooling is her superpower.

Supergirl!


We went to San Carlos, where they shut down the streets, let the kids run rampant, and go crazy with the decorations & theming. Though it was awesome being immersed like that, it was really packed & watching Bella dart through the kids was nerve-wracking - she could get lost really easily.

5 sisters, 4 husbands, 3 grandparents, 2 adult kids, and 6 kids (Ryan & Alanna don't count as kids, they can drink) - that was an EPIC Halloween!

Sunday:

Super chill day - I got up & out early so I could take care of my errands & get back to the house for organizing. Went to the local drugstores to check out the sales (got candy & more red hair gel for those days I need a bit more awesome), returned the too-big jeans at Ross & got 2 other pairs of jeans for the same price, in 2 sizes smaller, & got a plastic storage wheelie thing at Target to organize all the nail stuff in one place. It almost doesn't all fit in there, which is a bit frightening - I've gotten 90% of that stuff in the last month. The good part is that I'm actively using it, it's an actual skill (improving my painting/drawing skill as well as nail design), and it's something that I can see & get pleasure from daily, as opposed to some of my other collections & hobbies.

This weekend was fun - Friday was chill, Saturday was Santa Cruz with Herher & family to visit Whitney & Ian. We headed to the Boardwalk after some fun at her house (hula hooping, find the stinky poo poo, etc), but it kinda blew - one entire side was closed for construction, which included the caveman train ride, which we were all going to go on.

Oh well, we had a slush puppy, which sucked, and Herher & Bella went on the carousel, then the golden gem of the day walked by - it's THAT GUY! (shit, can't find the picture - head shaved & mulletted, tattooed, and pretty much awesome)

After the Boardwalk, we went downtown to make our own scents - Whits, Heather & I all made very different perfumes, but all smell good! That, and seeing the Santa Cruz chapter of the World Wide Thriller Zombie Dance were the highlights of the day.



Saturn Cafe for dinner, and it's still the angry-lesbian vegetarian place I remember, only the burgers suck a little more now. They don't have the right consistency, and crumble out of the bun too much. Bella found a boyfriend there, though, and the conversation was awesome.

Back to Whits, Bella got to play some music on Ian's keyboard, and they were both generally totally cute. Got home & cozied in for the night.

Sunday was Project Day - I hauled some of the boxes Dan gave me, got rid of some stuff, and organized the rest. I still have to decide if I'm keeping all my books, just hardbacks, or none at all - I don't read them too much, & I can always get what I want to read at the library. I do love having books, though...

Cleaned the house, & Ryan & Alanna came over for dinner - we went out to Taboosh in RWC. The food was good, but the service was unbelievably bad - we were one of 2 tables in the entire restaurant that were being used, and it still took forever to get food, drinks, refills (I had to go back to the kitchen to find someone), and the hookah we ordered took so long, we just told them to forget it.

But, it turned out well, we had time to go visit with Herher after dinner. Soph was asleep, so we gossiped and chatted for a few hours about random stuff. I really hope they hang out with us more often, even though we're loud and probably more than a bit intimidating!

I've been going a bit overboard on the nail designs. I bought a box of 500 nails to practice on, and I've gone through over half of them. That's a lotta nails, Uncle Ed! I made color nails of all the polishes I have, so I know what they look like on the nail instead of just in the bottle. Last night, I just bought another dozen colors (buy 1, get 1 half off! $.50!), plus a glow in the dark one I want to use for Halloween.




I've also been trying to recreate water marbling without water, since all my polishes dry too quickly to get it to work. I use my acrylic paints, drop them on the Mary Kay palettes (finally, a use for all that stuff!), and swirl it with the dotting tool. It's rough, and sometimes ugly, but I like the overall effect.



The Jack Skellingtons came out really well - if I weren't doing Red Queen for halloween, I'd do Jack on my nails, & maybe dress up as Sally. As it is, I think I'm doing either red bloody nails, playing card nails or black & red french.



Halloween: I'm thinking of wearing my red latex dress & a tiara for the Red Queen, kink-style. Another option would be the black ballgown with a black & red underbust corset. Not as much red, but more queeny, I think. Definitely more comfortable! Either way, I've got red hair spray that will redden up my hair.

Hair: red
Makeup: red lips, red glitter eyes, red heart on cheek
Clothes: red latex & clear heels or black ballgown & red leather corset
Red Kate Spade purse

Vanilla halloween - I have no idea. Dress in all white and go as a cotton ball? Heather & Whits are going as Bert & Ernie, Bella is Tinkerbell(a), & Sophie is going to be Supergirl. I think I might try for Elmo, since I'll already have red hair. Who else is red on that show?

Last night, I went over to Heather's for an impromptu pumpkin decorating party. Bella was the cutest thing ever - when she calls me, I can't say no to her. I think it's amazingly sweet, and ego-boosting every time she gets excited to see me or talk to me. And we have so much fun together! She painted her pumpkin entirely pink, and mostly with her hands - it was tough for me to let her get that covered in paint, but Heather was ok with is, so up to the elbow it went!



Whatchoo doin', Coco?
I'm painting my pumpkin.
Ok.
Whatchoo doin', Mama?
I'm painting my pumpkin.
Ok.
Whatchoo doin', Daddy?
I'm carving my pumpkin.
Ok.

She's gotta know what we're up to at all times!

As I walked in, Vinny was trying on his 1970's wig in the mirror, and looking quite pleased with himself. As I walked in, Bella gets the brilliant idea to put the wig on Sophie - and she dissolves with fits of laughter. I'm so glad I got that laugh on video! Of course, Mama & Coco had to try it on and be laughed at too, but Bella wouldn't even entertain the notion that the wig would be placed on her head. Diva.

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I did a few new designs this week, & loaded up on stuff from Michaels - those short sticks are perfect for using instead of orange sticks.

Also did my first ever pink & white full acrylic set on myself last night - it took forever, but I think it'll get faster with time. The tips I use are visible under the acrylic - I'm going to be using clear ones in the future.
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I feel mad, upset, sensitive, frustrated and overly criticized today. Work sucks, nothing good is ever said to or about me, just the endless negative shit and constant undercutting that makes me feel like no matter what I do, I'm going to be wrong. Do everything perfect? Well, you should have been a mind reader and taken care of X before you knew it was coming. FUCK YOU!

Comments that may or may not be subtly biting feel like they're slaps in the face. I know I do the same fucking thing sometimes, word a comment or response to be a backhanded compliment, sarcastic, or snide remark, and normally I can take them on the cheek, but today they're fucking killing me. Last weeks munch was very much the same, I was incredibly hurt by what Tom said to me, but I can't help that I'm loud - I'm not going to apologize for it. It's not her fault, but right after that, Julie lets out her trademark raucous laugh - WTF Tom, do you tell her to shut the fuck up, too?

Having family members talking about my lifestyle negatively around me (as opposed to directly to me) bothers me because it's not something I can address, laugh off, or even get mad about to them - I find out about shit 2nd or 3rd hand, and that shit bugs me. The fact that everyone knows what I do, and yet won't ask me about it directly, then spouts ignorant and cruel things is incredibly painful. It's not like I wear leathers & carry a whip 24/7, or even throw shit in their face - it's just like a large portion of my life is....nothing, just a blank void to them, and not even important enough to attempt to understand, even superficially.

On one hand, I'm incredibly blessed to have great sisters, and kids like Bella & Sophie to hang out with and get maternal with. On the other hand, it reminds me of what I don't have, and what I long for, daily. I honestly don't know what I'd do with myself if I miss the window for family & kids.

Everything seems to be snowballing in a negative way, & I want to crawl home & hide.

Today's word of the day: impotent.

I feel impotent about quite a few things today.

This is the voice Dan made me laugh hysterically with, and couldn't do it at all in front of Alix. Voila! Here to share with all!

http://bit.ly/WqzTE

lols, Dave has the best Wiener!





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